It appears that what we have here is a
failure to communicate.
Pulling my hair does not mean grabbing 1 strand or a fistful from the top of my head.
It is quite clear that often i have some words/terms or colloquialisms that are either original, geographical or just plain misunderstood.
Most of the time There are other times that I just don't make sense to anyone but me and my 32 other personalities.
A long while back on Being Peachy I released the first edition of the "Peachy to English Dictionary". Words terms and phrases I invented or that were invented by myself or my daughter or my daddy. Or at least I thought they were.
Over the last year I have continued to add to each category thus building this into something
completely insane that is surely a huge contribution to society as a whole and the very future of mankind.
There are 3 main categories- Definitions, Phrases and then Implied Meaning ( which includes southern speak) In many of the below I am a result on a google search and I am not sure if this is a good or bad thing, but the Leo in me says, " obviously it's all good baby".
Douche- do not need to use word bag or canoe or hat because this is the simplified version and the other endings are implied. example:
"every time I am around her I am like, "uh, your mans like a douche? "
* Silent Stare* - do not need to use the really? wow? ( in person) because the silent stare is the simplified version of, " you need medical help" or " I can't speak right now as I am contemplating how you will die"
"Bunco" - do not need to explain anything to your spouse, it is implied that this means you are going to bunco to get wasted, it's understood, this is the equivalent to guys poker night but with a lot more boobs and sex talk.
"medicinals" - do not need to explain that you are not actually getting these from the drug store or dr, it is implied they will come from a liquor store or still.
UNDERSTANDING SOUTHERN SPEAK-
When presented with a photo or heaven forbid in person the view of friends daughter in a wedding dress and she looks like a wilder beast got caught in a white silk trap you say,
" beautiful dress" NOT - OMG is that your husbands child? or did you get impregnated by a yeti?
When presented with an ugly baby ( and there are ugly babies) you have many options but most used is the 1 spouse option. Meaning if only 1 spouse is with the baby you say,
" aww he/she/it must look just like the mommy/daddy/missing spouse" not "aww he/she/it must look just like if a goat and a tele-tubbie bread, sorry about that try again?"
When you are confronted with someone you can not stand/tolerate and wish ill you say,
" well bless your pea pickin heart" not " I want to stab your stupid ass with a spork and push you in a vat of lemon juice filled with zombie sharks that have lazor beams on their head so they can track you and slice you and then flip you around like a volley ball."
* do not confuse this with Bless your heart" which literally means OMG you are so screwed .
When something happens you always thought was not only possible but indeed probable yet the person involved seem shocked since they have been living in denial, such as a neighbor tells you a local kid who was always a rotten little rat but since he played sports all his nasty deeds were over looked gets popped with 32 charges in the next town for doing the things your town has been letting him get away with and your entire town is shocked, you say-
"Well shut my mouth" not "I FUCKING TOLD YOU PEOPLE HE WAS A LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT FOR YEARS!"
Ok that's enough for now, if I give you too much too fast your brain will "pop like a tick" ( another southern saying, that makes me quite barfy). Plus I want some Tator Nuts and they close in 30 minutes.
Also this week I was honored to receive the "Stylish Blogger Award" from Sunny Sings the Blues and my Daughters Guest Post here at The Pits titled "Sam I am" garnered the "LOL" award fromBran~Muffin. Much thanks to both of them and the awards have been added to my award page over at BeingPeachy ! Much Thanks Ladies.