I put bling on my boomslang

You can touch  me here, you can touch me there, you can touch me, bitch did you just take my wallet?  I am going to jack your ass up.  No I mean it. I may be drunk but I will dot your fucking eye.

I am getting ready to head to Nawlins ( that's New Orleans for you Yanks)  for this Party ( that's conference for you real writers)   this weekend.

Anyway my KBC Cobra Sister  The ReckMonster !!!!  ( mandatory WOOT!)  sent me this Killaa  bling to wear.  Most bitchin part. She made it.  The only things I can make are drinks, a mess and babies, which coincidentally I can make all at the same time. ( mandatory WOOT!)

So I had to go over to Metairie this weekend ( that's next door to Nawlins)  so I did a test drive on some of bling  from CobraSister ReckMonster it looked like this.

So if yall are  coming to Nawlins for the party hope to see you there.  Look me up I will be under an assumed name so the stalkers ( cops) can't find me.

XO


PEACH OUT

I got some action yesterday

Yesterday I was sitting there reading this magazine article minding my own business and this hot guy walks in and sits down, we were alone in a tiny room.

He was hot.

I could tell he liked me, he barely made eye contact with me, but he struck up this intimate conversation, he wanted to know everything about me, and had a witty way about him, before you knew it I had put down my magazine. I spilled my guts and the conversation got very personal very quick.

Don't get me wrong I am happily married to the Droid and I don't go running around hap hazzardly flinging myself on men, it's  hard to contain this level of hotness on a daily basis but I do my best.  This guy was just so damn smooth.

Next thing I knew there he was looking me dead in the eyes, holding my hand, inches from my face. Can you say "awkward?"   

It didn't go any further than that.  However I did give him my name and phone number, I also agreed to see him again  in a couple weeks.   

The only thing that pisses me off about the entire thing was the co-pay.  I mean that just cheapens the relationship don't you think?  I couldn't figure out if I should call the girl who took my check his receptionist or a pimp?   I told Droid about it and he said next time I should go ahead and make him strip for me, so I get my money's worth.  

This is totally why our marriage works.

xo

PEACH OUT

porn stars, the strip, family reunions and more

It's just one more reason I won't ever get that Mom of the year award.  Spring Break 2011.

Started out really innocent. My 21 year old daughter and her College roommate R headed down and scooped up me and The Prince and we headed over to LA ( that's totally Lower Alabama) to the Family reunion.  

All the fun you can stand right?  Well it ended up with us partying in Panama City Beach Florida on Spring Break and this was the theme Song that blared from every hotel room and car stereo.

here are some words that stick out from the week

Krispy Kreme,  beer bong, rattlesnake round up, mullet toss,  shuttle craft,  docking,  stripper pole,  ladies,  passport,  tongue,  drunks,  panties,  crabs,  merman,  watersnake,    guitars, porn stars,  swamp crotch,  smack smack smack,  ” I EAT WOOD!” ,  Sydney and talent.


All of these words came from the people in my group. Oh yes.  Oh yes.


So there we have it.  His Birthday is the 23rd of this month, consider it an early present? 
My kid  just had his first Florida Spring Break With College Chicks.  
( I swear his voice dropped)




Congrats little Dude.








XO




PEACH OUT