Wednesday, February 9, 2011

I'd like to teach the world to sing, or stun gun it. either way I guess

I'd like to teach the world to sing.  Ok that's a lie, I would like to teach Chrapstinka Haguliera to sing, ok that's a lie too, I would actually prefer that she is stun gunned and flown in a crate to Tazmania

What the needs now:

a redefining of several countries political policies and structure,
a solid Apocalypse plan,
a state dedicated soley to morons, for morons, and ran by morons
a State free of Morons, for non morons, and ran by non moronic people
a little more cowbell,
a lot more vodka
Male strippers and hooters girls as TSA agents thus making people happy to be groped and tip jars
Mandatory white chocolate cheesecake free to all citizens of the planet 1x a month
Shock collars on bratty kids, and remotes in the hands of people subjected to said bratty kids
Parents willing to realize not every kid is gifted
Parents willing to realize their particular child may be a Moron
Neighbors willing to shoot a person robbing your house
Cars that run on dryer lint
Rosie the Robot assigned to every house ( because I would love to have a Rosie from The Jestsons)
A digital thermostat for the planet so we can decided the climate.

is love sweet love, and vodka and cheesecake.
or any of these things
Jedi Squirrels 




Marie Nicole said...

I hope I don't fall under the moronic people. I know I sometimes qualify, but overall I hope I'm not one of them. But then again, most morons believe they're not morons. So if I think I may be one I think we can automatically assume I'm not. Which by coming to this conclusion I may have just fucked up my odds.


ツ my cyber house rules

Oilfield Trash said...

Oh how I love this post.

Yes the world already has a state of morons, it is called Louisiana. lol Sorry Miley.

Krissy said...

Peachy for President for this one alone, "Mandatory white chocolate cheesecake free to all citizens of the planet 1x a month!" You rock!

Oh, how I wish we could have so many of those.

Unknown said...

The Bench votes:
Yes on more cowbell
Yes on more vodka
Yes on Rosie the Robot

The Reckmonster said...

Would the shock collars and remotes be free to parents willing to put them on their own kids to "cure" bratty behavior? If so, I'm in (and so is my kid). And also, can't Rosie be "Matt Damon the Hot Housekeeping Robot" instead? I'm not trying to be greedy, but I'm just sayin...

ThePeachy1 said...

Recker- uh yeah, I am going for the Branden Fraser robot model. the other stuff, yes yes and probably yes.

JRM said...

Just so you know, the University of Florida has an apocalypse plan, for zombies at least... I wrote about it here: